Baby does not want to eat. How to address this challenge?

If your baby can talk and tell you why he refuses to eat, then you will not be reading this post 🙂

Here are possible reasons:
teething.
do not need as much food as you are feeding him.
full / not hungry.
not yet ready for solids.

Some ideas to try:
+ Start with tiny portions.
+ Make new food look similar to a familiar favorite of baby.
+ Combine with his favorite food. For example, my first baby loves banana so much, so I added a tiny chunk of banana to every spoon of his puree.
+ Believe that your baby knows how much food he needs.
+ Reverse psychology. My first baby wants to eat when I place him on my lap during family time, I just give him mashed brown rice.
+ Never force feed your baby. Foce feeding can turn feeding time into fighting time.
+ Do not give your baby junk food, instead offer him healthy food and a hungry baby will eventually eat them.
+ Accept that babies are supposed to make a mess while eating – this is their learning process. If your baby is a messy eaters, he is showing signs of independence – a milestone for his learning, growth, self-reliance, self-esteem.
+ Relax. Let your baby go at his own pace.

Gratitude exercise: write a letter / post about a gadget / an appliance that benefits your life

I am grateful for my blender.
Blender is a versatile small appliance that everyone who loves home made, healthy, and delicious food must have.

Herein, I write a post to describe how my blender has benefited and brought joy to our lives.

Dear blender

Thank you for being so efficient in providing my family with delicious and healthy food.

We have enjoyed so numerous healthy and delicious items.
Papaya milkshake
papaya banana milkshake
banana chocolate milkshake
strawberry banana milkshake
avocado chocolate milkshake
avocado coffee milkshake
honeydew milkshake
They taste so delicious, preservative-free, 100% natural, and healthy (I normally do not add additional sugar like commercially available juices).

Puree for baby (ideas for recipe here)

Next, I plan to try use blender to make soup (Oh! how I miss those hot / warm soup of 2007-2009).
The following recipes are designed on my mind (no testing done yet) as inspired by other recipes.

PUMPKIN SOUP
1. cook / the followings in a pan / pot / rice cooker / slow cooker:
# pumpkin
# meat / pork rib and/or dried scallop
# 1 clove garlic, minced
# 1 onion, chopped
# pepper to taste
# thyme, chopped / ginger / cinnamon / Rosemary
PS: I may also saute the garlic, onion, thyme / ginger with olive oil / sesame oil.
2. Then blend in small batches (e.g. 1 cup / time) / use hand blender.
3. To make the soup creamier, add milk.
4. Garnish with fresh parsley / coriander.

SWEET POTATO SOUP
Same as pumpkin soup, just replace the pumpkin with sweet potato

CREAMY BAYLEYS MUSHROOM SOUP
Use low heat to saute mushroom in little olive oil.
When the liquid is released from the mushroom, add Bayleys and cream / oat.
Transfer the mushroom into a pot of boiled meat / ribs.
Bring to boil. Add milk.
Add pepper to taste.

More ideas …
barley soup
pear soup
add carrot to sweeten to soup

Tips:
for your safety, use bottle brush to wash to prevent the blades from accidentally cutting any of your finger.

How to prevent and overcome constipation? 4 natural easy ways

Constipation is bad because waste matter that is stuck in the colon for too long has been known to release bacteria and other harmful contaminants back into the bloodstream.
Constipation affects both adults and children.
Being a mother, I have been checking regularly that my baby passed motion daily.

Here, are tips to prevent and overcome constipation.

Drink (plenty of) water.
W for Water, as I recall telling my baby while bathing him.
To keep hydrated, it is important to not only drink plenty of water but also minimize and (if possible) avoid alcohol and caffeine-containing beverages like coffee, tea and soda.

Eat more fiber,
e.g. beans, whole grains, brown rice, nuts, oatmeals, crunchy vegetables.

How much fiber do we need daily?
men: 38 grams
women: 25 grams

Types of fiber:
(1) soluble fiber
(2) insoluble fiber

Soluble fiber is present in beans, peas, oatmeal, nuts, seeds, apples, pears, strawberries, and blueberries.

Insoluble fiber is present in whole grains, barley, couscous, brown rice, nuts, seeds, carrots, cucumbers, zucchini, celery, green beans, dark leafy vegetables, raisins, nuts, grapes, and tomatoes.

Soluble fiber is associated with lowering LDL (bad) cholesterol, regulating blood sugar, and a lower risk of heart disease and type 2 diabetes.

Insoluble fiber helps keep you regular, prevents constipation, and reduces the risk of diverticular disease.

Exercise
Prolonged lack of inactivity causes constipation, so let’s exercise together!
I prefer gentle exercise like walking or swimming. It has been ages since the last time I swim! The last time perhaps was at Girton College, Cambridge.
Bonus:
The posture of kneeling and resting your body on your hands (屁股功) can help to create the urge to pass motion.
My mother is a strong advocate of this exercise and has helped a relative to overcome her constipation by practicing such a posture.

Too busy to answer the natural call to visit the loo?
Ignoring the urge to have a bowel movement causes constipation, so do not delay bowel movements.

To summarize, to prevent and overcome constipation:
1. drink water
2. eat fiber
3. exercise
4. Do not delay bowel movements

Exercises to hone public speaking skills inspired from Toastmasters

Once, I had the opportunity to attend a sample club meeting of a Toastmasters Club.
Although I found such a meeting provides a platform to develop & hone our public speaking skills, I decided not to join immediately because I had other priorities at that moment.

However, whenever we have the opportunity (time & audience) to give a speech (e.g. to an audience of strangers), we should cherish it.

Below are some exercises to improve our communication skills, especially for giving public speeches / talks.

# Storytelling : You can tell a story to your (younger) family member, this activity nurtures companionship & communication. A friend’s Dad used to tell stories to her until the age of 10 – that is when her father died due to lung cancer, but to her, who chooses to believe in every cloud has a silver lining, her father lives forever in her heart.

I have also been telling stories to my baby from the lovely books written by others, but how I wish I could tell him more on personal stories, something related to him, his family members, the place where he was conceived & born. To many of us, the most meaningful stories are those that are personal or those that we can relate to personally.

# Prepare & practice : Remember the 10,000 hours of deliberate practice that the best in every field have diligently undertaken. When you practice more, your create new brain connections, you become smarter, stronger, & healthier.

# Count Ah : While you practice delivering your speech / giving a talk, record it. Then re-listen to your speech, count how many times you make the audible pauses such as "ah," "er," "um," "well," and "you know". Try to minimize it next time.

# Impromptu : Get a collection of common topics. Give a 1-2 minutes or 5 minute speech about it. This exercise trains your mind to think fast & clearly, to organize your thoughts well in a very short amout of time.

# Timer: Besides using timer to keep track and manage time while cooking, heating up food for your baby, you can also use timer to refine our speech, so that we do not over talk & give other people a chance to speak.

# Record & Review : You do not need an expensive gadget, you can simply use your mobile phone to make a video.

Bonus exercise:
# Listen to inspiring talks (e.g. TED talks, BBC documentaries), note down the main points, re-deliver the talk using your own words & illustrations (personal / local examples) & if you can, add your own reflections. Be innovative!

How to travel while breastfeeding?

How to travel while breastfeeding, either with or without your baby?
How to fly breast milk?
Can I pump or breastfeed on a flight?
Note : The water on some airplanes may have coliform bacteria so please do not use it to clean your pumping equipment or bottles.
Tips :
1. Pre-sterilized your pumping equipment if you need to pump on a flight.
2. request bottled water (but may not be 100% safe as well).

For a 6-day (inclusive of the days of flying in and out) travel.

To bring:
# pre-sterilized breast milk plastic bags. I use Nanny & Medela brands. While traveling, I intend to pump 3x daily, though I pump 4x now, so I prepare 4 x 6 = 24 bags.
# a cloth to cover.
# a copy of birth cert (in the event that the security staff needs further verification).
# baby dishwashing liquid & a foam to wash the equipment.
# universal adaptor (mine also includes a USB port for charging mobile phone).
# power point & fully charged battery (tentatively buy at destination).
# Medela pump.

# a tube & a 1-to-2 homemade connector.
# breast shields, placed in stainless steel container for easy sterilization.
# Royce ice cooler & cooler bag.

# Plan A : If there is a baby who wants my breast milk, I would be very happy to donate to him / her.
Remember the melanin tainted powdered milk for baby? My breast milk is safe.

# Plan B : bring back the frozen breast milk for my baby.

Where are the nursing rooms?
Changi Airport
Terminal 1
# Near gate holdroom C24 at Departure Transit Lounge West, Level 2
# Near gate holdroom D36 at Departure Transit Lounge East, Level 2
# Near Kaboom retail outlet at Departure Transit Lounge West, Level 2
# Arrival Hall West, Public Area, Level 1

Terminal 2
# Near gate holdroom E1 at Departure Transit Lounge North, Level 2
# Departure Transit Lounge South, Level 2
# Near Check-in Row 7, Departure Check-in Hall Central, Public Area, Level 2

Terminal 3
# Arrival Hall Central, Level 1
# Near Check-in Row 6, Departure Check-in Hall Central, Level 2
# At both sides of Departure Immigration Central, Level 2
# Departure Check-in Hall North, Level 2
# Departure Transit Lounge North, Level 2
# Departure Transit Lounge North, Level 2
# Next to gate holdroom B1 – B4 at Departure Transit Lounge North, Level 2
# Inside gate holdroom B1 – B4 at Departure Transit Lounge North, Level 2
# Next to gate holdroom B9 at Transit North Pier, Level 2
# Departure Transit Lounge South, Level 2
# Departure Transit Lounge South, Level 2
# Next to gate holdroom A1 – A8 at Departure Transit Lounge South, Level 2
# Inside gate holdroom A1 – A8 at Departure Transit Lounge South, Level 2
# Inside bus gate A6 – A8 at Departure Transit Lounge South, Level 1
# Next to gate holdroom A21 at Departure Transit Lounge South Pier, Level 2
# Outside gate holdroom A16 – A20 at Departure Transit Lounge South, Level 2
# Inside gate holdroom A16 – A20 at Departure Transit Lounge South, Level 2

According to bumblebeemum.wordpress.com,
power point is Available inside nursing room.

China Nanjing Lukou International Airport
According to breastfeedinganywhere.wordpress.com:
apart from the baby-nursing necessities, the nursing room also provides books and toys for the needs of children of different ages. It is located at the Departures Domestic Concourse.

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Safety in pregnancy

NO to caffeine.
Caffeine (found in coffee, tea, soft drinks, chocolate) readily enteres the baby’s bloodstream and accumulates in the brain.
When I knew that I was pregnant in my 1st pregnancy, I started to abstain from cofee, tea and soft drinks.

NO to alcohol. Beware of food with alcohol, e.g. tiramisu.

NO to chemicals.
Organic solvents used in dry cleaning can pass through placenta.
Pregnant women who are exposed to organic solvents at the workplace (e.g. laboratory technicians, factory workers, professionals artists / chemists) may also place their developing baby at a greater risk of developing birth defects.
Avoid chemical finishes e.g. stain repellents, flame retardants, paint / DIY products which emit fumes.
Avoid chemical air fresheners.
Avoid heavily scented cleaning products e.g. dishwashing liquids, floor cleaners, washing powders, pesticides.

NO to hair dyes / perms.
Remember that pregnant mothers are blooming beautifully, you do not need to change the color of your hair to feel beautiful.

NO to cigarette.
Avoid smokers. Exposure to as few as 2 hours a day of 2nd hnd smoke also significantly increases the risk of having a low-birth-weight baby.

NO to deep-tissue massage e.g. foot reflexology, Shiatsu.
No to sp treatments that raise pregnant mothers’ body temperature e.g. body wraps, sauna.

YES to exercise.
Walking is highly recommended for at least the 1st 2 trimesters.

When in doubt, always consult your doctor.

Related:
How to achieve pregnancy (Billings method) in the Dragon year?
Early signs of pregnancy
Challenges in pregnancy
Stay positive, be protective in pregnancy
Improve your lifestyle in pregnancy.
Checklist for week 20 scan during pregnancy.
Insurance.

Food for pregnancy:
soup of Beet root, Carrot, and Dates

Soft spot on baby's head

You will notice that the spot pulses in time with your baby’s heartbeat (like a mini-rhythm section) or bulges out a bit when your little one strains to poop.

Your baby’s soft spot is actually two spots called fontanels — one toward the front of that sweet little head; another smaller one toward the back — and they’re gaps between the bones of your baby’s skull.
After a baby’s born, they stay open to accommodate your baby’s growing brain.

The fontanels are well protected by a sturdy membrane. So go ahead — it’s okay to touch them (gently of course).

Eventually, the bones in your baby’s skull will build up enough minerals to completely fuse together and those gaps will close.

The back fontanel will close first — typically when a baby is between two to four months old.

The front fontanel stays open well into your baby’s second year (to give that amazing brain the space it needs to grow), though by the time your little one turns 19 months old even that fontanel should be closed.
This soft spot may close as early as nine months of age or as late as two years. The average is between 12 to 14 months.

Normally, a baby’s soft spot is firm and curves in just slightly.

But call your doctor right away if you notice these two (rare) signs of trouble:

1. A fontanel that is dramatically caved in.
This is a sign of dehydration.

2. A bulging fontanel.
This can be a sign of head trauma, an infection in the brain, or a buildup of fluid around the brain — especially if your baby has a fever and is excessively sleepy.
But don’t panic if the fontanel just pooches out a bit when your baby cries or vomits — if the fontanel goes back to normal when your baby is sitting up and calm, then all is well.

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How to prevent the arrival of premature baby? progesterone

I wrote this post few months ago.

In the 34th week, I experienced pain while walking and went to ob-gyn to do check-up.
My condition has 50% risk of delivering premature baby.
In the 35th week, I was prescribed progesterone which made me so drowsy.
I remembered how I dropped the pen I was holding half-an-hour after taking progesterone.
Then I did not feel my baby moving too, perhaps he suffered from the drowsiness as well?
As a rule of thumb, if I feel 5 baby’s movements every 2 hours, it should be ok. My ob-gyn has more lenient rule, at least 12 baby’s movements per day.

Though progesterone caused my drowsiness, progesterone helps to prevent premature baby, so it is ok to endure the short term discomfort.
The financial cost of having premature baby is large, amounting to ~$1,000 per day of hospitalization until the baby is mature.

Dear baby, welcome to the highly competitive world! Being creative is better than being competitive

Dear baby

Do you know that there are courses out there that keep on telling Mommy “teach your baby or toddler [insert any of these: to Read / Math / Music]”? To accelerate the rat race, the advertisement goes “You can start when your baby is 3 months old.”

Yes, Mommy started to teach you things that Mommy thinks as necessary, such as praying, sign language, idioms, texture exercise, mirror exercise to increase self-worth / self-love and awareness of body parts, vowel exercise. You responded by happily producing sounds that Mommy still does not understand: baby language.

When Mommy told a friend, he said that Mommy is highly . competitive. However, Mommy thinks that it is good & essential to introduce you the joy of learning early in life. Since you received a lot of (second-hand) toys and was given a few new toys, Mommy will not buy you any toys. We are a frugal family and Mommy wants to save for more important things for your, e.g. healthy fruits & vegetable. However, Mommy shares with you the joy of our world through play in the nature (including parks / beaches / hills / mountains / lakes) enforced with powerpoint slides to help you remember the words, beautiful books, shopping groceries in the supermarkets / markets (Yes, the markets are your playground).

Sometimes, Mommy wonders if Mommy if a competitive person. Recently, Mommy learned from Uncle W that being creative is better than being competitive; and Mommy thinks that Mommy is a creative, instead of a competitive person. Do you know what are the differences between being competitive and being creative? Mommy will write another post in the near future.

Since you are my dearest, Mommy aspires to gives you only the Best that Mommy can afford to nurture creativity, independence, and happy learning in you since your early days.

In fact, Mommy acknowledges that Mommy learned and shared a lot to you through voice notes about many lifelong skills while being pregnant with you. That perhaps explains why you are a happy baby, as observed by Aunt Flower who helped to care for you when Mommy was too weak to carry you around.

Mommy wants you to grow in a happy, healthy, harmonious baby, toddler, child, and then adult. They said it takes 10 years to grow a tree, 100 years to nurture a human being (十年树木，百年树人).

Mommy happily takes on this challenge. Mommy feels that while nurturing you, Mommy also benefits because Mommy has a chance to learn new things that Mommy did not learn as a kid, and re-learn beautiful things that Mommy has experience.

May your life be abundant with joy, happiness and generosity.

Love,
Mommy

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How to soothe baby to sleep? An understanding of light sleep vs deep sleep ; 4+6 essential tips

What are the differences between light & deep sleep?
LIGHT SLEEP:
aka REM (rapid eye movement),
our brains wake up,
dream and stir, turn over,
adjust the covers without fully awakening.
Babies have twice as much active, or lighter, sleep as adults.
Light sleep helps the brain develop because the brain doesn’t rest during REM sleep.
During REM sleep the body increases its manufacture of certain nerve proteins, the building blocks of the brain.

DEEP SLEEP:
quiet sleep,
mind and body are quietest,
muscles are loose.

About dreaming while sleeping:
Baby has more dream sleep than adult.
I find it funny when my first son chuckled in his sleep, his tummy vibrating on me and his mouth making a large grin.

How to induce babies to sleep?
1. gentle rock.
2. nurse / breastfeed.
3. sing lullabies.
4. ensure that babies are not too hot.

Blueroselady: I personally find that latching my first son is the most effective,
possibly because it quenches thirst and relieves hunger,
gives warmth and secured feeling through close body contact.

Since my spouse has no breasts,
he sings the soothing Ave Maria and it works.

More modern version:

Unlike adults who can usually go directly into the state of deep sleep,
infants in the early months enter sleep through an initial period of light sleep.
After 20 minutes or more they gradually enter deep sleep,
from which they are not so easily aroused.

Babies have shorter sleep cycles than adults.
About an hour after a baby goes to sleep,
he begins to squirm,
he tosses a bit,
his eyelids flutter,
his face muscles grimace,
he breathes irregularly, and
his muscles tighten.
He is reentering the phase of light sleep.
The time of moving from deep to light sleep is a vulnerable period during which many babies will awaken if any upsetting or uncomfortable stimulus,
such as hunger, occurs.

SOLUTION:
When your baby enters light sleep,
and you are sure that baby is not hungry / breathless,
1. do not move him e.g. from your lap to his cot within the 1st 20 minutes,
2. lay a comforting hand on your baby’s back,
3. hold his hand,
4. sing a soothing lullaby,
5. play soothing music / pre-recorded voices of your singing / saying prayers,
6. be there next to baby if he is in your bed (beware of the risk of pressing into him);
you can help him get through this light sleep period without waking.

Do not force your babies to sleep deep for too long.
Why?
“Nightwaking has survival benefits.
Tiny babies have tiny tummies,
mother’s milk is digested very rapidly.
If a baby’s stimulus for hunger could not easily arouse her,
this would not be good for baby’s survival.
If baby’s nose was stuffed and she could not breathe,
or was cold and needed warmth,
and her sleep state was so deep that she could not communicate her needs,
her survival would be jeopardized.”

But, here is a good news for tired parents:
“From three to six months, most babies begin to settle.
They are awake for longer stretches during the day and some may sleep five-hour stretches at night.
Between three to six months, expect one or two nightwakings.”

A piece of for parents:
“Remember that your baby’s sleep habits are more a reflection of your baby’s temperament rather than your style of nighttime parenting.
And keep in mind that other parents usually exaggerate how long their baby sleeps,
as if this were a badge of good parenting, which it isn’t.
It’s not your fault baby wakes up.”

Personal note:
When our first son was 2 months old,
he loves to wake up at night and needs someone to chat with him.
Oh my goodness!

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