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Posts Tagged ‘independence

Baby does not want to eat. How to address this challenge?

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If your baby can talk and tell you why he refuses to eat, then you will not be reading this post 🙂

Here are possible reasons:
teething.
do not need as much food as you are feeding him.
full / not hungry.
not yet ready for solids.

Some ideas to try:
+ Start with tiny portions.
+ Make new food look similar to a familiar favorite of baby.
+ Combine with his favorite food. For example, my first baby loves banana so much, so I added a tiny chunk of banana to every spoon of his puree.
+ Believe that your baby knows how much food he needs.
+ Reverse psychology. My first baby wants to eat when I place him on my lap during family time, I just give him mashed brown rice.
+ Never force feed your baby. Foce feeding can turn feeding time into fighting time.
+ Do not give your baby junk food, instead offer him healthy food and a hungry baby will eventually eat them.
+ Accept that babies are supposed to make a mess while eating – this is their learning process. If your baby is a messy eaters, he is showing signs of independence – a milestone for his learning, growth, self-reliance, self-esteem.
+ Relax. Let your baby go at his own pace.

Written by blueroselady

October 30, 2013 at 6:47 am

How to age healthily? 14 nutritious & delicious tips that are less commonly applied

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Growing up and growing old is inevitable.
Now, the question is: how can we age happily, healthily, and graciously?
Here are tips that are related (and semi-related) to food – one of the most basic need of human beings according to the Maslow’s hierarchy of needs.

1. Do not let negative stereotypes hold you back.
Believe that you can be healthy and independent.
Have a strong faith that you can contribute values to society and enjoy lives (e.g. travel the world, do exciting activities such as skydiving).
A positive attitude is essential to keep your appetite well.

2. Be aware that the speed / rate we age varies depend on genetics, environmental influences (e.g. pollutants), and lifestyles (including diet, exercise).
In Singapore, the average life span is 81 years old as of 2013.

3. Be physically self-sufficient, so that you can cook for yourself (home-cooked food is always the best!), you can have fun independently.

4. Be financially self-sufficient, so that you can afford to buy nutritious healthy food.
Never ever be financially dependent on progenies / children / nephews / nieces.
Raising children != investing.
Story A:
A good friend of mine K helped to arrange for an elderly care for his divorced uncle.
The old man’s sons refused to take care of him, fortunately he still has a filial nephew.
But how many people like K are out there?
Story B:
A middle age woman whom I know well kindly shared with me that although our world promotes filial piety and even children story books strongly encourage children to love their parents regardless of the economic capabilities of their parents, people can still be affected financially.
Elderly parents who are financially independent can be more likable / gain more respects because they do not have to give additional financial burden to their adult children who have to raise young family.

5. Be emotionally self-sufficient.
You will no longer need daily companions of your children when they go to study / work.
If they visit you daily, it is good.
If they are too busy to visit you, you can pray for their well-beings and success, you can call them using telephones, Skype, KakaoTalk, etc.
The elderly can also seek friends of similar interests / do activities that they have longed for doing.

6. To prevent osteoporosis and fractures, increase intake of Calcium, vitamin D, protein, and do weight-bearing exercises e.g. hiking, dancing.

7. To obtain sufficient vitamin D, spend 10 min under the sun daily or consume oily fish.

8. Eat smaller portion s-l-o-w-l-y but more often.
Enjoy your meal.
Live to eat,
savor every bite and sip.

9. Eat colorfully!
Fruit and vegetables of different colors provide different vitamins and minerals.

10. Eat diversely.
Travel the world through your taste buds.
Consider having each of these per day in a period of 1 week / 10 days / 2 weeks:
Korean food,
Japanese food,
Sichuan food,
Cantonese food,
Vietnamese food,
Peranakan food,
Indian food,
Italian food,
French food,
… and the list goes on.

11. Eat whole grains (e.g. brown rice).
If it is too hard for you, consider the followings:
Cut food into small piece / ground the meat.
Eat softer / mashed / pureed food, just like how babies eat!
Try juices & pureed fruits.

12. Select fats wisely.
Olive oil, sunflower oil, avocado are better sources of fat.
Avoid trans fat that are high in content in fried food, bakery, cakes.
Reduce butter, full cream milk, coconut milk as they have saturated fat.

13. Keep hydrated.
Ensure that you urinate 10-12x within 24 hours.
If not, it means that you do not drink enough.
Apple juice-like of urine color indicates dehydration.

14. As one ages, one will lose teeth and lose senses in taste buds.
Chewing meat to enjoy the taste only is insufficient to obtain protein, you must eat the meat.

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Written by blueroselady

April 18, 2013 at 7:32 am

Dear baby, welcome to the highly competitive world! Being creative is better than being competitive

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Dear baby

Do you know that there are courses out there that keep on telling Mommy “teach your baby or toddler [insert any of these: to Read / Math / Music]”? To accelerate the rat race, the advertisement goes “You can start when your baby is 3 months old.”

Yes, Mommy started to teach you things that Mommy thinks as necessary, such as praying, sign language, idioms, texture exercise, mirror exercise to increase self-worth / self-love and awareness of body parts, vowel exercise. You responded by happily producing sounds that Mommy still does not understand: baby language.

When Mommy told a friend, he said that Mommy is highly . competitive. However, Mommy thinks that it is good & essential to introduce you the joy of learning early in life. Since you received a lot of (second-hand) toys and was given a few new toys, Mommy will not buy you any toys. We are a frugal family and Mommy wants to save for more important things for your, e.g. healthy fruits & vegetable. However, Mommy shares with you the joy of our world through play in the nature (including parks / beaches / hills / mountains / lakes) enforced with powerpoint slides to help you remember the words, beautiful books, shopping groceries in the supermarkets / markets (Yes, the markets are your playground).

Sometimes, Mommy wonders if Mommy if a competitive person. Recently, Mommy learned from Uncle W that being creative is better than being competitive; and Mommy thinks that Mommy is a creative, instead of a competitive person. Do you know what are the differences between being competitive and being creative? Mommy will write another post in the near future.

Since you are my dearest, Mommy aspires to gives you only the Best that Mommy can afford to nurture creativity, independence, and happy learning in you since your early days.

In fact, Mommy acknowledges that Mommy learned and shared a lot to you through voice notes about many lifelong skills while being pregnant with you. That perhaps explains why you are a happy baby, as observed by Aunt Flower who helped to care for you when Mommy was too weak to carry you around.

Mommy wants you to grow in a happy, healthy, harmonious baby, toddler, child, and then adult. They said it takes 10 years to grow a tree, 100 years to nurture a human being (十年树木,百年树人).

Mommy happily takes on this challenge. Mommy feels that while nurturing you, Mommy also benefits because Mommy has a chance to learn new things that Mommy did not learn as a kid, and re-learn beautiful things that Mommy has experience.

May your life be abundant with joy, happiness and generosity.

Love,
Mommy

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Written by blueroselady

March 31, 2013 at 7:18 am

How to read? 10 tips for children that are also applicable for adults

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Reading & comprehension are essential skills for learning of all subjects.

To be an independent learners, our chidren / we
# must read CAREFULly.
# must have a good command of VOCABulary.
# must be able to make INFERENCEs.
# must minimize errors in GRAMMAR, SPELLING, & PUNCTUATION when writing review / reading journal / 读书心得.

Good readers are able to
# UNDERSTAND the text.
# THINK CRITICALLY about what the author has said, as the saying by Mencius goes "尽信书不如无书." We need an analytical mind.
# make CONNECTIONS / relate between the text and our own background knowledge / real life events.
# REFLECT upon the ideas given in the text.

Since reading is so essential,
how to read effectively, efficiently, and happily?

1. Reading must be meaningful.
Read with a purpose,
a question in mind,
then our children / we will be motivated.

2. Make reading a daily habit / routine / practice at home.

3. Visit libraries / book shops to get food for our minds like visiting market to get daily food for our bodies.

4. For young readers who have little background knowledge, unlike we adult, choose diverse, enjoyable, readable books.
Readable books refer to books that our children are able to read, not difficult books.
If the books are too difficult, children may get discouraged to enjoy reading.
When I was a little children, I made the mistake of trying to read tough classical books, and ended up not reading them because the rich vocabularies were too much for my little command of language at that time.

5. For your readers, parents can read aloud to them.

6. Consider also audio books / pre-recorded text in voicenotes.

7. STORY TELLING helps to develop listening & oral skills. Encourage our children to re-tell parts of story read, without making it sounds / feels like a hard test.
Soothing / angelic voice(e.g. J’s voice) helps.
Characters come to life when they have a voice, and sound effects are more compelling if they are convincing and audible.
Slow down at the key part.
The storyteller Neil Griffiths advices "Read aloud to them stories they love again and again!" I agree that repetition works.
Neil thinks that children can start listening to stories since they are in the womb!
In other words, unborn babies are never too young to enjoy listening to stories.
I also think that children never become too old for story time;
there is a child inside everyone of us.
If we can be child-like again,
even if our body has matured and aged, our soul will be happy!

8. Visualize the story.
Use photographic memory
to remember & recall the story / lesson.
A story can empower us with the ability
to dream, to dream imaginatively, to DREAM BIG.

9. Diarize our reflections / opinions / favorite parts from reading because developing both writing & reading skills does support each others.

10. Quiet room and peace / tranquility. If this is not possible, we can use ear pieces to listen to music that is suitable for reading. Supportive environment: neither too hot nor too cold.

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Written by blueroselady

March 31, 2013 at 12:29 am

How to build a marriage to last?

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Love is more than a feeling. It is something to DO each and every day. Decide to love your spouse, regardless of your feeling / emotion.
Trust and confide in one another.
Be willing to lower expectations set before marriage.
Be persistent over commitment, pursue happiness within marriage rather than simply staying because of the commitment.
Rspect and value each other.
Express feeling to one another.
Be intimate and close.
Have mutual sexual satisfaction.
Express understanding and support.
Encourage independence in one another.
Express contentment and appreciation / gratitude.
"Love me when I least deserve it, because that’s when I really need it." Swedish proverb.

Written by blueroselady

November 25, 2012 at 1:59 am

Thiel Fellowship allows you to bypass top schools to pursue big dreams

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Dreams are extremely important. You can’t do it unless you can imag(in)e it. — George Lucas

If you are so smart, why are you not rich?
If you are so smart, why are you not changing / saving the world?

About Thiel Fellowship
$50,000 / year for 2 years ($4,167 / month)
gives you easy and quick access to the most successful business people in America
aim: to skip college and focus on work, research, and self-education (LEARN BY DOING)
mentors: network of visionary thinkers, investors, scientists, and entrepreneurs, who provide guidance and business connections that can’t be replicated in any classroom.
founded by a VC Peter Thiel (PayPal, Facebook)

Examples of descriptions of the Thiel Fellows:
On experience
"leave Harvard after a single semester and extend his horizons, first by traveling around the world and climbing Kilimanjaro, and now through his start-up"
"has lived and been educated in England, Singapore, France, and the USA."
"began taking college courses at Worcester State in Massachusetts in 3rd grade, and received a certificate in computer science by the time he was 12."
"taught himself programming at the age of 9"
"a home-schooled prodigy who learned calculus at 11, started working in a biogerontology lab when she was 12, matriculated at MIT when she was 14, and now at 17 plans on disrupting the current research paradigm by changing the incentives embedded in today’s traditional funding structures."
"started doing research in a pathology lab when he was 10. By the time he was 12, he had matriculated at the University of Washington. Soon after, he graduated with honors degrees in neurobiology, biochemistry, and chemistry. He was a 19-year-old 4th-year neuroscience Ph.D. candidate at Stanford University when he left early this year to pursue his start-up"
"has worked for Microsoft, Stanford, and Mozilla"
"Has previously worked at iRobot’s Research Group and as a Program Manager at Microsoft."
"In his teens, he built products for companies such as Coca-Cola and Universal Music"
"has designed web interfaces used by millions of people around the world"
"has previously worked for D.E. Shaw & Co., several social enterprises, and a few start-ups"
"founded a vacation rental portal as a high school freshman"
"starting his first business when nine years old"
"co-founded the Electric Vehicle Club at Purdue and was president of Purdue Innovations, the university’s entrepreneurship club."
"began developing her social enterprise when she was 15"
"first worked in a lab when he was 11, interned at Dupont as a teenager, and won the grand prize at the 2009 International Sustainable World Energy Olympiad in Houston."
"run non-profit dedicated to helping the vision-impaired around the world"

On goals / aims
"aims to radically improve our approach to the one thing we all do – shop." / "e-commerce start-up that will revolutionize price comparison on the web" Keyword: radical
"passionate about equipping people with the information to make better decisions." Keyword: information, decision
"interested in helping people protect the wealth they create from the harmful effects of inflation" Keyword: protect
"to help emancipate information around the world" Keyword: information
"to decentralize banking in the developing world with a mobile payment system"
"to create and share online lessons designed to be viewed at home by their own students, leaving class time free for more engaging activities"
"to revolutionize how we develop and demonstrate talent in the twenty-first century."
"to leverage web-based videos and mobile apps to bring the classroom into the twenty-first century"
"to build efficient motor for electric vehicles." Keyword: energy
"to commercialize an invention that enables low cost dual-axis photovoltaic module tracking" Keyword: energy
"to invent a walker-wheelchair hybrid that can provide power to assist its user according to how strong she feels at any moment" Keyword: aging, physically-disabled
"to extract valuable minerals from asteroids, comets, and other planetary bodies" Keyword: resource

Blueroselady thinks that they are very impressive and inspiring. How many people, before reaching 20 years old, have done so much and dreamed do big like them?
The people whom you have worked for also matter.

Reflections by Blueroselady:
Those on Thiel Fellowship seem to have a head start in their childhood (e.g. well educated parents, attendance of high schools that teach akin to college / attendance of college – so why would they still want to attend college again), but many children from less privileged backgrounds will find a college education still essential and enlightening.
Personally, I have met people of the possibly equal calibre to the Thiel Fellows, they started businesses / attended university / led beyond school organizations at early teen, while most teens are worried about growing up, peers, relationships, and juggling schools. The formers are ambitious, lucky, talented, hardworking ((they have built their CVs while other kids probably do not know what CVs are for), and most importantly have the right nurturing environment.
To illustrate this point, I shared my own example. When I was 12 years old, I found that the school was boring. My teacher suffered from diabetes and she was often absent. I could read the textbooks on my own. I told my mother that I did not want to go to school. I was happier reading newspapers and books.
When I was 13 years old, I found that some my school (male) teachers are irresponsible. They taught students bad words, touched female students’ hands / arms (and please do not ask me what else). If my parents had to pay for the school fee, I would probably quit schooling. To make matters worse, some of my school mates went astray. Girls were so cruel with words, I was helpless seeing them bullying a not-pretty girl sitting in front of me. My school mates were more interested in gossips (about seniors, juniors, peers, celebrities), hanging out wasting their lives, than in learning. Few years later after I left the school, I heard about a school mate who died from drug overdose, a school mate who got pregnant in early teen and turned into less beautiful (premature aging) than she was, a school mate who died in motorbike accident.
Then, a macro event happened that changed my life forever. I went overseas for the first time and attended much better schools (in term of quality). I learned about things that were forbidden / not taught before and revolutionized my thinking. I changed for the better, I unleashed my inner characters of hardworking, perseverance, and humility. Like entrepreneurs who focus on generating profits, I had clear focus: I was determined to earn the money required for college education through excellent results because my parents would not be able to support me after high school. My hard work and perseverance paid off, I received my college education (in 3 continents, East and West) with full scholarships. Every stage is like climbing to a higher ladder, I meet people who are more talented, creative, diverse than ever (many of them have better a head start childhood than me), and college education allowed me to learn from them. It is true that the higher you move to, the more you can see, understand, and do. As a result, I evolve into what I am today. At the end of my formal college education, I read analytically, write convincingly, think from multiple perspectives, converse fluently in multiple languages (I can mimic American, British, French, Indian, mainland Chinese accents), had traveled to more countries than the years of my lives, understand myself better, and most importantly have germinated the strongest urge (that I have ever had) to better our world.

From another point of view, colleges worldwide are getting very expensive. Students take loans, enjoy their college experience (sadly some focus on hanging out with friends, buying the latest gadgets), and postpone their sufferings of having to pay their loans while working and struggling to meet an end meet after the honeymoon period of college days. This sounds to me like an upcoming education bubble, which is akin to the housing bubble. To make it worse, colleges seem to mass produce workers (who are happy with the good enough), and to produce (in much less proportion) thinkers, innovators, agents of change. The latter are those that refuse to be entirely submissive and driven to the system. Colleagues and acquaintances are complaining to me about the drop in the standard of recent college graduates.

Nothing remains the same because lives are dynamics. My future generations will do things differently from what I did. If they are academically inclined, they can start learning the college materials (through online courses or immersion in labs) at early teen. If they are artistically inclined / entrepreneurial in nature, they can start interning at early teen. I still view traveling as essential, I learned a lot about independence, responsibilities, management, self-control, and survival while traveling and living in foreign countries far from my family. I made strangers my friends and family. I appreciate the values of every place and person. Get more exposure, discover more, and you will discover what your destiny is.

What’s next?
I will be reviewing my plan on progeny.
To research on things kids need (to learn) to be successful in their lives.
To research on homeschooling curriculum (what are not taught in school).

More about the Thiel Fellowship:
http://dealbook.nytimes.com/2011/05/25/finding-the-next-mark-zuckerberg/
http://www.creators.com/opinion/john-stossel/the-college-scam-11-07-06.html
http://www.forbes.com/sites/jmaureenhenderson/2011/06/20/meet-the-teen-who-got-paid-100-000-to-drop-out-of-school/
http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052970203960804577239253121093694.html?mod=googlenews_wsj
http://www.businessweek.com/interactive_reports/bs_collegeROI_0621.html