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Are you / your loved one an ESFJ? ~26 simple descriptions to understand them

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To know your personality type,
you can do an instant self-guided assessment here.

A friend A, who has showered me with sisterhood’s love (that I have never ever imagined), is an ESFJ, I may be wrong, but I am highly interested to understand her, so that I can be a good, supportive friend of her. I am really grateful to her and wish that she will discover her happiness in romance and work.

@~@ ~ 12% people are ESFJ
@~@ quite popular / good with people, good at manipulating them (to achieve their own ends) while they believe that they are following a solid moral code of conduct.
@~@ good at reading others, and often change their own manner to be more pleasing to whoever they are with at the moment.
@~@ need to feel appreciated and know they’ve helped someone. altruistic
@~@ dislike conflict and criticism
@~@ well-organized
@~@ strongly need to be liked
@~@ need to be in control
@~@ do not mind monotony, routine work
@~@ place a lot of importance on what is socially acceptable, and can be very cautious / critical of anything unconventional / outside the mainstream.
@~@ SF people base their moral compass on established traditions / laws, upholding authority and rules, rather than drawing their morality from philosophy /mysticism like NF people do.
@~@ have a strong moral code that is defined by the community that they live in, rather than by any strongly felt internal values.
@~@ enjoy hearing about their friends’ relationships and activities, remembering little details, ready to talk things out with warmth and sensitivity. can be kaypoh, indeed practical matters and gossip are their bread and butter.
@~@ ESFJ thrive on staying up to date with what their friends are doing
@~@ Use their SJ (sensing and Judging) characteristics to gather specific, detailed info about others, and turn this info into supportive judgments.
@~@ prefer plans / organized events to open-ended activities, than spontaneous activities.
@~@ good career: personal accountant (not corporate accountant), teacher, social work / medical care.
@~@ expect AUTHORITY to be respected and backed up by rules and standards
@~@ can be efficient, hard-working subordinate; but struggle with too much freedom and improvisation
@~@ often seek friends at work
@~@ almost always willing to lend a hand when / where it’s needed
@~@ excellent networkers (think of Bill Clinton), seem to "know the person" to bring a project together on time.
@~@ when ESFJ’s suggestions / help are turned down, they can take it personally.
@~@ vulnerable to stress
@~@ never challenge the authority of ESFJ as she can stress out, loses her temper, and just generally reacts badly.
@~@ ESFJ’s natural partner is ISFP or INFP. ESFJ prefers stable, harmonious relationships and like a partner who is able to be loving and committed, even when the ESFJ has strong emotional reactions. PS: I’ll be on hunt for such a desirable man for my friend.

What can we do to support a loved one who is an ESFJ?
@~@ must thank / appreciate her from time to time (whenever there is such an opportunity to do so)
@~@ never tell her you that are critical of her beliefs / habits / traditions (if any). Iit can hurt her greatly / cause her to be very defensive). ESFJ dislikes criticism.
@~@ if you must turn down her suggestions / help, do it very very diplomatically.
@~@ do not challenge her authority.
@~@ as a friend, I must respect / be supportive of her dreams or opinions
@~@ talk more about practical matters (e.g. cooking, how to solve work problems efficiently), she likes it.
@~@ do not talk too much about your private selves that you are not comfortable that others would know, but reveal some that you do not mind others to know… she enjoys knowing specific details about you. We are learning to love / understand kaypoh people.

20150524

Written by blueroselady

May 24, 2015 at 6:37 am

Has anyone donated to your blog? If yes, please share your story

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Since the spring 2013,
I started putting a link to donate to me at the end of my post.

Until the early summer 2013,
nobody has visited my donation page.

I don’t want to bombard my dearest readers with ads or affiliate links,
so asking for donation is an option for me.
I believe that if I bring values to others,
the financial reward will come naturally.

Marian Schembari wrote that although she wanted to donate for some blogs that she like,
she has actually never done it.
Donating is like giving tips.

Although nobody has donated to me,
I aspire to write and share my best knowledge and wisdom.
I will never give up.

Now, I am learning from the following people:
@~@ Darren Rowse shared that for getting willing donations, a blog must have (i) a very large readership (ii) a very loyal readership (iii) no other forms of income because they result in a perception that the blog was already making money
@~@ Jimmy Moore, of Livin’ La Vida Low Carb, who makes a couple hundred bucks per month from donations.
@~@ Jason Kottke of www.kottke.org : He created supporter list for 2005, which he also called his micropatrons.

What will I do?

(A) I will write a free e-books for my dearest readers.
Is there any particular topic that you want me to write about?
I would love to hear from you!

(B) When someone donates to me (in the near future),
I will thank you!
You are my supporters!
I am a grateful person.
I give without expecting gratitude from others,
but when others give to me,
I always try my best to express my gratitude.

Blueroselady, がんばる!
Blueroselady, 加油!
Blueroselady, 传灯!

Written by blueroselady

June 16, 2013 at 6:43 am

Are you / your loved one an INFJ? ~40 simple descriptions to understand them

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To know your personality type,
you can do an instant self-guided assessment here.

Since a good friend of mine is INFJ and I would love to understand her,
I have been highly motivated to learn (and now share) about INFJ people.

INFJ = Protector = Counselor = Confidant = Healer = Foreseer Developer.

Only 1% of the population has INFJ personality (the most rare personality type).

Dear INFJ,
“You are not here merely to make a living.
You are here in order to enable the world to live more amply,
with greater vision,
with a finer spirit of hope and achievement.
You are here to enrich the world,
and you impoverish yourself if you forget the errand.”
Woodrow Wilson

Famous people who are INFJ:
Amelie Poulain
Carl Jung
D Yuri Zhivago – Doctor Zhivago
Eleanor Rossevelt
Goethe
Jimmy Carter
Mahatma Gandhi
Martin Luther King, Jr.
Mother Teresa
Nelson Mandela
Nicole Kidman
Oprah Winfrey
Plato

and fictional characters of INFJs:
Luke Skywalker
Jane Eyre

Bloggers who declare themselves as INFJs:
Jennifer Zhang
Barbara Coz

@~@ live with integrity / have strong value systems / Highly principled.
@~@ is independent.
@~@ is creative (artistic / original / INFJ live in a world of hidden meanings and possibilities).
@~@ INFJs often think by way of images ; their minds are of visual nature.
@~@ When engrossed in creative flow / Csikszentmihalyi’s flow , INFJ experience themselves in perfect synchrony with the universe. Some have described this as a trance (an altered state of consciousness in which they morph into a vessel of creative energy). Others have likened it to divine inspiration or being visited by muses.
@~@ is visionary / idealistic / future-oriented.
@~@ are constantly in a state of self-renewal ; believe in constant growth and don’t often take time to revel in their accomplishments.
@~@ constantly seeking meaning and purpose in everything.
@~@ determined (they rarely stray from their vision no matter what it is / they don’t believe in compromising their ideals).
@~@ devoted.
@~@ hardworking.
@~@ generally “doers” as well as great dreamers.
@~@ deep / complex (INFJ has complex feelings & take great care to express them).
@~@ cooperative in reaching their goals.
@~@ gentle / easy going (although they have very high expectations of themselves).
Gandhi remarked that “In a gentle way, you can shake the world”.
@~@ is an excellent listener with almost infinite patience. In the words of infjoe, “Just because I’m quiet doesn’t mean I’m not listening. I’m busy focusing on the things that aren’t being said.”
@~@ INFJs are old souls. Many grow up feeling wiser than would be predicted by their chronological age.
@~@ natural nurturer / focus on human potentials.
@~@ altruistic / love to contribute to welfare of the human beings.
@~@ INFJ enjoy the chance to share their wisdom, theories, and insights.
@~@ natural leader ; although they are not generally visible leaders, they quietly exerting their influence behind the scenes with their families, friends, and colleagues. To quote Susan Cain, “Quiet leadership is not an oxymoron.”
@~@ caring / warm / helpful / compassionate / service-oriented / can readily ingratiate 讨好 themselves to others.
@~@ insightful ; artful / canny understanding of people & situations ; INFJ can become aware of another’s emotions or intentions-good or evil-even before that person is conscious of them. This ‘mind-reading’ can take the form of feeling the hidden distress or illnesses of others to an extent which is difficult for other personality types to comprehend.
@~@ INFJ are quick to differentiate the “real and authentic” from the “fake and contrived”. INFJ can ‘X-ray’ other personalities / they can “read” people.
@~@ Value deep, authentic relationships.
@~@ highly intuitive / spontaneous within themselves.
@~@ INFJs concern themselves with forging new connections and reconciling opposites by way of their Intuition.
@~@ focus their attention on the big picture rather than the details, and on future possibilities rather than immediate realities.
@~@ strong empathy ; INFJ have strong ability to take into themselves the feelings of others, hence they can be hurt rather easily by those around them, which, perhaps, is one reason why they tend to be private people, mutely withdrawing from human contact.
@~@ protective of their inner selves, sharing only what they choose to share when they choose to share it ; reserved about expressing their true selves.
@~@ INFJs tend to be quiet ; they expend energy in social situations (whereas extraverts gain energy).
@~@ orderly / systematic (in their outer world) ; INFJ constantly define and re-define the priorities in their lives.
@~@ INFJ are system builders; most INFJ systems are founded on human beings and human values.
@~@ Can work logically and rationally – use their intuition to understand the goal and work backwards towards it.

@~@ believe in their intuition & tend to ignore other people’s opinions. Solutions: seek trusted mentors / Jedi / collaborators.
@~@ cannot tolerate conflict very well. can easily burn out / suffer depression. Solutions: develop strong inner strength & inner peace.
@~@ a perfectionist who doubts that they are living up to their full potential ; there’s always something else they should be doing to improve themselves and the world around them.
Solutions:
1. be gentle with yourself.
2. be mindful of the intrisic desire of INFJ to constantly improve their romantic partner which may be perceived as being naggy, know when to apply Siberian North Rail Road technique (Stope, Breathe, Notice, Reflect, Respond).
@~@ highly sensitive. Solutions: learn how to center & ground yourself while realizing other people’s problems aren’t always INFJ’s to help fixing.

@~@ INFJs seek high quality, in-depth relationships.
@~@ INFJ see love relationship as an opportunity to connect and grow.
@~@ INFJ enjoy relationships when they are improving and changing, but not stagnation.
@~@ INFJ’s natural partner is the ENTP, or the ENFP. INFJ is also compatible with INTJ.
Why ENFP?The inner world of INFJs in many ways resembles the outer world of ENFPs. It is playful, colorful, mischievous, and daring.

When other people don’t get INFJ, they see INFJ as manipulative / weak / unstable.

Suitable career for INFJ:
entrepreneur / marketer.
artist (e.g. designer, photographer).
scientist where they make use of their intuition.
medical Doctors / dentists / alternative medicine guru (e.g. Chiropractor, Reflexologist).
psychologists / psychiatrists.
Counselors / Social Workers.
teacher / professor / trainer.
Child Care / Early Childhood Development.
writer.

At work, INFJ stay motivated and happy … as long as they are working toward a dream they support.
INFJ are not good at dealing with minutia or very detailed tasks. The INFJ will either avoid such things, or else go to the other extreme and become enveloped in the details to the extent that they can no longer see the big picture. An INFJ who has gone the route of becoming meticulous about details may be highly critical of other individuals who are not.
Life is not necessarily easy for the INFJ, but they are capable of great depth of feeling and personal achievement.

Related:
http://infjoe.wordpress.com/ : with highly recommended comic / cartoon !
http://www.personalitypage.com/INFJ.html
http://www.oswego.edu/plsi/infj.htm
http://neverneverneverquit.wordpress.com/2012/10/16/i-am-an-infj/
http://anxietyadventures.wordpress.com/2012/08/15/infj-introversion-intuition-feeling-judging/
http://amytempleman.com/wordpress/2011/10/infj-what-my-meyers-briggs-personality-type-means-to-me/
Susan Cain’s Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking.

If you find my writings are useful to you, please donate to me by clicking here.

The Credo of a Business Knight

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"I believe that global business has the money & the power to make a significant difference in today’s troubled world, & that by making that difference it can help itself as well as others.
I envision business raising its sights above the bottom line.
I envisage business becoming a vocation, like the higher professions.
To make this possible I believe that business must add a moral dimension, becoming more service- & value-oriented & largely elimination the assumed natural distinction between private enterprise & public institutions.
I envisage business taking responsibility for the world in which it operates & from which it creates its wealth.
And I envisage myself becoming one of those business leaders who are "servant leaders" — leaders who serve not just stockholders, colleagues, employees, products, & customers, but leaders who also serve the community, the planet, humanity, the future, & life itself."

Authors: Danah Zohar, Ian Marshall

Written by blueroselady

December 10, 2012 at 9:52 am

How to increase our income?

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Income = value x time x scalability

Indeed, in September 2012, I learned from an Australian mentor with numerous patents (KS) that scalability and low cost enable easy commercialization.

How much are you worth currently?
Your hourly current value = monthly income / hours worked per month

To create more value to our company and our clients, we must keep upgrading our knowledge, skills, intellectual capital.

We must constantly install new software into our mind in order to be able to create more value.

It is not one’s age, experience, or academic qualifications, but how much value one can create for his company / clients that matters and translates into different levels of income.

It is about "WHAT CAN YOU DO?"

Let us compare 2 insurance advisers.

Insurance adviser A, age 33, monthly income $3,000.
Waits for leads.
Follows up on leads.
Give adequate presentation on products / services

Closes the sale.
Never follows up with the client thereafter.
Closes monthly premium of $7,000.

Insurance adviser B, age 33, monthly income $20,000
Sets specific monthly sales target.
Actively generates leads from all source.

Creates partnership with other companies.
Ensures a minimum of 2 appointments for consultations / day.
Gives seminars on financial planning.
Writes and publishes a book on financial planning.
Does a a detailed needs and outcome analysis for potential clients.

Presents a highly beneficial and value-added plan for the client.
Helps the clients save money and identify important needs client may have overlooked (i.e. corporate insurance, estate planning, asset protection).
Follows up every 3 months to ensure client’s emotional and financial needs are met.
Sends a quarterly e-newsletter to his customers packed with tips on money management and investments.
Able to generate even more referrals from powerful services.
Helps recruit and train more sales people for the company.

Closes monthly premium of $50,000.

Now, let us compare 2 teachers.

Teacher A, age 42, monthly income $4,000
Has worked for 12 years.
Teaches the curriculum.
Gives and marks homework.
Gives tests and mark papers.

Fulfills minimum extra curricular duties.

Teacher B, age 34, monthly income $9,800
Has worked for 4 years.
Teaches the curriculum.
Able to motivate and inspire even the weakest and most unmotivated students.

Innovates / develops new curriculum / teaching methods.
Writes systems of best practices.
Trains new teachers.
Produces innovative marketing ideas to enroll more students.
Develops strong rapport with parents and provides additional family counseling.

Innovates ideas to increase department productivity, reduce expenses.
Has written 6 textbooks, assessment books that are sold locally and over the internet.
Uses accelerated teaching methods to boost grades.
Conducts seminars / workshops on weekends for parents on how to motivate their children.

Conducts seminars for students on exam skills.
Consultant to private tuition centers.

Things to increase in order to increase income:
1. leads
2. conversion rate
3. repeat business
4. average dollar purchase
5. net profit margin

In more details …

LEADS
learn how to create more effective advertisements (stronger headlines, more persuasive copy, i.e. text)
TV, radio, newspaper advertising
industry newsletter advertising
internet / email advertising
magazine advertising
outdoor advertising
flyers
promotion / sale
ask for referrals
member get member scheme
offer free gift
insert into other company’s invoice
letterbox flyers
sales teams
telemarketing / make more cold calls
buying / swapping database
seminars, events, roadshows
attractive window display / video
posters, large signage

CONVERSION RATE
define our unique selling proposition
set sales target
excellent customer service
introduce myself
survey our past customers
sell key benefits (not features) passionately
high quality in store posters / brochures
in-store sales scripts
be a consultant / problem solver
give a money back guarantee
benefits, testimonials list
give free bonuses that increase value
great prospects and use their name
learn closing techniques
ask for the sale more than once
personal grooming, high dress standards
video in store displays
leave price to last
study and prepare for objections
specialized knowledge about our products and industry
focus on client’s needs and emphasize benefits
convenient payment scheme (credit cards, nets)
offer installment schemes with 0 interest
allow mail order / home delivery
address concerns / possible objections upfront
sell on value not price
use NLP to build strong rapport with clients
follow up with prospects regularly
improve our presentation skills

REPEAT BUSINESS
direct mail offers of the months
keep in touch every 3 months
inform clients of our entire range of services
target likely repeat customers
send special occassion cards
make customers feel special (super experience)
build a close relationship / friendship
create a loyalty program
exceed customers expectations
discount voucher off the next purchase

AVERAGE DOLLAR PURCHASE
focus on a higher income target market
use a shopping list
sell add-ons/up sizes
make sure our client knows our full range of services
suggest most expensive first
create value packages / bundle several products in a package
buy 3 get 1 free deals
ask people to buy some more
increase prices by 10%
arrange easy finance and payment
free gift / lucky draw with $xx purchase
ask customers to buy more (e.g. McDonalds, do you want to have a combo meal? do you want to upsize? do you want to have a dessert? do you want toy?)
up sell
cross sell
do a complete needs-analysis to find out how we can add even more value to customers

NET PROFIT MARGINS
increase prices
sell on value / service than price / discounts
set monthly budget targets
track costs weekly and aim to reduce by 10%
stop running ads that do not work
sell more higher margin items / sell higher margin products 1st
source for cheaper suppliers which are just as good
bargain hard with existing suppliers
increase working efficiency

Written by blueroselady

September 24, 2012 at 3:37 pm