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Archive for the ‘God’ Category

Taming the Tiger Within: advices from Thich Nhat Hanh to diffuse anger, conquer fear and cultivate love.

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Recognize & embrace your anger when it manifests itself.
Care for it with tenderness rather than suppressing it.

Many of us begin a relationship with great love,
very intense love.
So intense that we believe that,
without our partner,
we cannot survive.
Yet if we do not practice mindfulness,
it takes only one or two years for our love to be transformed into hatred.
Then, in our partner’s presence we have the opposite feeling,
we feel terrible.
It becomes impossible to live together anymore,
so divorce is the only way.
Love has been transformed into hatred;
our flower has become garbage.

If you see elements of garbage in you,
such as fear, despair, and hatred, don’t panic.
As a good organic gardener,
a good practitioner,
you can face this:
"I recognize that there is garbage in me.
I am going to transform this garbage into nourishing compost that can make love reappear."

Mindfulness means to be present,
to be aware of what is going on.
This energy is very crucial for the practice.
The energy of mindfulness is like a big brother or big sister,
holding a young one in her arms,
taking good care of the suffering child,
which is our anger, despair, or jealousy.

When you say something unkind,
when you do something in retaliation,
your anger increases.
You make the other person suffer,
and they try hard to say or do something back to make you suffer,
and get relief from their suffering.
That is how conflict escalates.

If it is your partner who is angry, just listen.
Listen and do not react.
Do your best to practice compassionate listening.
Do not listen for the purpose of judging, criticizing, or analyzing.
Listen only to help the other person express himself and
find some relief from his suffering.

If we are able to touch our ground of no birth and no death,
we will have no fear.
That is the base of our true happiness.

Written by blueroselady

January 2, 2014 at 3:32 pm

Painting: The Beheading of Saint John the Baptist

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The Beheading of St John

Venue: St. John’s Co-Cathedral, Valletta, Malta.
St. John’s Co-Cathedral is the church with the most beautiful marble floor that I have been.

“The Beheading of Saint John the Baptist” by Caravaggio
is one of the memorable paintings that I have seen.
At first, I felt it was scary,
then yesterday I started to realize how mighty St John is,
he has to suffer such a humiliating death.

The painting is large, very large,
it stretches 1-storey high.

When I was 6 years old,
I stayed up late and my busy parents were too busy earning a living to take care of me.
I watched a scary scene in TV where the entire family members were beheaded.
I wondered how human beings can be so cruel to another.
Now, I do not remember the story, but that scene.
I have to keep telling myself that it is fake,
but movies are often based on real life experience,
if not imagination of people.

Lesson 1:
Roderick MacKinnon is right.
TV is bad for you,
including news.
Many news are about disasters and wars.
Do not watch or read about news
the 1st thing in the morning and
the last thing at night before you sleep.
If you must know about particular news,
it will come to you through your family, friends, or colleagues.
Dramas about personal (at smaller scale) to national (at larger scale) conflicts
are bad for you,
you may subconsciously pick up
how women quarrel with each other,
how men fight over money and women,
how countries grow greedy wanting other resources belonging to others.
Do not let your children watch shocking scenes without proper parental guidance.

Lesson 2:
Life must go on.
We can do nothing about the past,
we cannot help / save people who had gone / events that have occurred.
Learn from the past.
Focus on the present
and work for the future.
We can promote peace and harmony.
We can empower our future generation:
our children, our grandchildren, our great grandchildren.

Written by blueroselady

March 15, 2013 at 3:29 am

Were I the Perfect Child of God

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Written by blueroselady

December 8, 2012 at 2:32 pm

Posted in God, music

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What is next? the art of detachment

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A mentor from Singapore sent me a transcript by Dr Richard Teo Keng Siang.
He was a 40-year-old millionaire and cosmetic surgeon with a stage-4 lung cancer.

Below are what I learned from the sharing which I integrate with my growing thoughts.

Medical aesthetic is a growing field. Richard viewed his patients (sources of income) as vain women, but I empathize with women with low self-esteem. Some people simply do not have the opportunity to grow their inner strength, to detach from the influence of media that worships celebrities and the superficial opinions of other people around them. Sadly, the other people can include parents, spouse, lover, and friends. I remember how my mother’s sister suggested that I should go for a surgery. I was just a primary school kid, and her words did hurt me. Fortunately, I did not listen to her! Later in life, I learned that my attribute is desirable by men whom I am attracted to. Of course, there are also people who have not grown to the stage to accept themselves as a gift from universe. I do not mean to judge, but I respect that different people have different perspectives in life.

A good friend is a gift.
Richard’s friend, Danny offered to extract Richard’s wisdom teeth, went for a 2-day fast for Richard’s recovery.
Danny is a man that goes all the way for his friend.
I want to be like Danny for my friends.

Hebrews 12:7-8
"Endure hardship as discipline as God is treating you as His children"

Cancer patients told Richard that many times, people tell them to stay positive.
But those people do not have the same experience as the cancer patients.
However, Richard, being a cancer patient himself, has the license to encourage cancer patients.
While we have positive intentions to encourage people, sometimes our words / actions may not be received well.
Sometimes ago, I volunteer to work with cancer patients. A lady told me that she needs not help after finding out what my profession is. I felt slightly discouraged, but I respect her perspective.
I also remember when I wish someone "Good Luck", and she said "no need".
Similarly, we often hear angry mothers telling their husband "you will never understand the pain of labor".
In contrast, in countries like Singapore and Switzerland, we also hear angry men telling their women "I have to waste n years of my life doing military services, while you enjoy faster progress in education and career".

It is important to have a trust / belief / faith. For Richard, Danny, Blueroselady, and many people, this includes the belief in God. There are people who do not believe in the religious God, but the act of respecting nature / universe, is a form of belief as well.

It is important to love and make service / contribution to others.
To quote Lusi Lim, "while we are celebrating the glory of human success, we must not forget: One day, our wealth, fame and power will all become irrelevant because it will all come to an end…"

According to Richard, many people are blessed with good wealth, but cannot handle them. The more people have, the more people want.
According to Matthew 19:23, Jesus said to his disciples, "I tell you the truth, it is hard for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven."
Hard does not mean impossible.
In the mass that we attended on the same day we celebrated our anniversary, I learned from the priest that church teaching does not forbid us to accumulate private property, but we must not be attached to our materialistic wealth.
Therefore, Blueroselady strives to master the art of detachment.
Wealth on its own is neutral, but the master of the wealth can use it for different purposes, e.g. to build hospitals, schools, to help the poor versus to show off by purchasing lavish luxury things (cars, bungalows / villas).
Moreover, there are also different kinds of wealth, we need to achieve a balance in acquiring each aspect of wealth.
Too much focus on materialistic wealth may compensate the growth of spiritual and wisdom wealth.
If one has dependants e.g. children and old parents / relatives without sufficient social security, a total neglect on the acquisition of materialistic wealth (in the basic form of money) is also against our God-planned purpose.

Written by blueroselady

October 24, 2012 at 3:20 pm

How to do God's plan in the right dose?

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In a beautiful Sunday noon in the late summer 2012, the homely was about the pharisees focusing more on upholding the laws of ensuring cleanliness before eating rather than following God’s plan.
But what really matters is inside a man instead of outside of him.
Evil comes from inside of men, instead of outside.
That’s why we have to be careful when we talk, not to talk evil (e.g. things that hurt others).

How do we know what God’s plans are?
To illustrate, a father loves his son so much and allowed him to play computer games. Consequently, the son has poor eating habit and poor social skills.
A fresh graduate wants to go to a foreign land to serve as a volunteer yet neglecting a retired mother (without income) alone at home.
A priest helped a family with a 4-year old son by buying them groceries, but the father is so arrogant that he was unable to keep his new job for more than 2 weeks (after a long period of unemployment). The father also threatened the priest to give the family money. This is an example of over helping.

Over helping can ruin the life of people we care and love.
Yet, too little helping is also going against God’s plan.
So, how do we know what the right dose is?
The act of balancing is challenging, but not impossible.

Written by blueroselady

October 7, 2012 at 12:55 am

Posted in choice, God

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Make us true servants

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Make us true servants to all those in need,
Filled with compassion in thought, word and deed;
Loving our neighbour, whatever the cost,
Feeding the hungry and finding the lost.

Lord, make us prophets to cry out the way,
telling the nations of mercy’s new day.
Let us break barriers of hatred and scorn,
speaking of hope to all people for lorn

Lord, make us healers of body and mind;
give us your power to bring sight to the blind;
Love to the love- less and gladness for pain,
Filling all hearts with the joy of your name.

Written by blueroselady

September 22, 2012 at 2:39 pm

Posted in God, music

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A prayer for my baby in Aug 2012

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Please help my baby to grow healthily and happily.
Please help my baby to have positive outlook of life, always think positive and solution-oriented.
Please help my baby to find a role model from maternal grandmother who is persevered and calm in the face of difficulties, disasters, and death.
Please help my baby to find a role model from paternal grandfather who is a big dreamer and multi-talented (a former entrepreneur, martial arts teacher, impromptu designer and engineer, and a lifelong learner).
Please help my baby to grow kind, sweet, polite, gentle in words and actions especially towards parents and the weaker ones.
Please let baby to grow into a beautiful child and adult, with innocent, kind, encouraging eyes and charming smiles.
Please help my baby to grow up to be multilingual (at least 3 languages), to respect people of diverse backgrounds, to have many friends and few close lifelong friends.
Please let my baby to learn about internally generated happiness and peace, because many times people cannot expect too much from the world.
Please let my baby to grow inner strength, not easily affected by bad peer, if any, and negative influences from media.
Please let my baby to grow up to like reading books and appreciate nature, to dislike watching TV and playing computer games.
Please let my baby grow up to like healthy food hailed from worldwide, to dislike junk food, to care about his nutrition.
Please help my baby to be proactive and responsible at his study and work.
Please let my baby to find the love of life, just a person, no multiple partners, no divorce, but a person who deeply loves my baby and allows my baby to live and grow happily together till old ages.
Please let my baby to live passionately.

Written by blueroselady

August 27, 2012 at 1:59 pm

Posted in God

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